While daydreaming at work, I was suddenly hit by this: how old am I? I don’t know about you, but after a certain age, I’ve started losing track of my age. Before I am pinned down as forgetting out of convenience, let me just clarify that I have no problems turning a year older. In fact, I was just telling my boyfriend that I can’t wait to turn 30. 30 seems like such a sophisticated and powerful age. That’s the age when you’ve got your shit together, and know what you want (or what you don’t want, which is a dumb boy who can’t keep up). Let’s not forget, it gives you a lot more credibility when you’re no longer in your 20s. In my mind, being in your 30s means that you still remember how to have fun, but you’re no longer willing to risk killing yourself doing it. The fear factor for me is losing a year without being conscious of it.
Going back to that day at work, I was frozen in the spot when I realized that I couldn’t be sure of my age. I did the one thing I could think of, which is to count the years from the time I was born, except in my state of panic, I had forgotten to factor in my birthday month (which is in the fall) and thought I was a year older. I was seized with panic because I thought I had lost a year. Did I mention that I’m also really bad with numbers? It comes and goes. When I realized the mistake, I calmed down. I told Seth when I got home this ridiculous story, and he reminded me that after a birthday, you would be in your next birthday year. For example, I’ve established that I am 28, so ever since my 28th birthday, I have been on my 29th year. Oh. My. God. While I was in shock at this realization, Seth said: if you think about it, birthdays are celebrated because of how you managed to stay alive for another year. There are so many uncontrollable factors everyday that can take away a life. Birthdays are really a way to say: good for you for making it this far!
Too often we’re obsessed with getting closer to death, but have you ever thought that you should be congratulated for living another year? I think I have a new appreciation for birthdays.